Hi everyone, welcome to the 14th edition of awful jokes as part of the Hold Humour distraction project in the COPE campaign.
As many of you know, this month is significant for me for a few reasons. One, I am challenging myself to complete more than 50 Haikus in the Haiku Hope project before the month ends. Two, I am working throughout the month to try and venture outside for the first time in nearly 3 years – there are regular updates about this on the My Agoraphobia page. Three, at the end of the month I turn 43.
Why is this significant? Well, everyone seems to have an age that’s their benchmark for getting old, or their parents being old, or the oldest age they’ve ever imagined themselves. We all have a line somewhere in the sand. Mine is 44.
44 is the age I always remember my Mum. Its the age I’ve realised I never imagined getting to. It’s the age my father was when he left for the first time (that I remember). It just seems to be a milestone hanging over me.
In the past I’ve never been bothered about my age or anyone elses for that matter. I’ve had partners who were significantly older than me (there was an age gap of 11 years with my first husband), and I never thought twice about the numbers. Now, I still couldn’t care less about how old my partner is – he’ll be my number one however he looks, whatever his passport says and whatever happens. But my own age has become a bigger issue, and counting the number of lines on my face has become a regular passtime.
So, to counteract the impact of those thoughts, here are 5 silly one-liner jokes, all meant to make us think a bit more light-heartedly about that dreaded number attached to us.
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Joke 1
You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Joke 2
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.
Joke 3
The older we get, the earlier it gets late.
Joke 4
You know you’re old when getting lucky means a short wait for a GP appointment.
Joke 5
You know you’re getting old when you look for your glasses for half an hour and they were on your head the whole time.
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Remember if you need more distractions then there are more jokes on my Hold Humour page, as well as haikus on Haiku Hope, awful poems on Crap Poems and odd language in Weird Words. I also have a page dedicated to stress hacks and other ideas to try if you need a distraction within the COPE campaign section of this website.
If you need help with stress or your mental health then you can find useful information and contact details for organisations that can help on the Get Support and Mental Health and Suicide Prevention Support Lines pages on this site.
Remember, you are not alone.
Thanks for visiting ❤️
Creative Steph 